One might think I am addicted to drama when I look back on this year...or perhaps even the last few. Sure I get bored easily but I don't think it's that. I had actually got fed up with things and was going to take things simple around this time last year but that all got messed up with a bit of a love-hate relationship I fell into which is still going a year later.
The good news? I am going on my first adult overseas trip as a result to India
The bad news? I am in love with a narcissist
The good news? When he finally went overseas he realised he needs me and can't do without me and freely admits he loves me now.
The bad news? He is online each day being bossy and has some odd ideas for his future which are against my principles.
Get it? don't worry I don't either.
I am struggling with what sort of special someone I want in my future. I met a few others amidst our feuding periods when I was trying to make a fresh start. Two were long term chat friends I finally got around to meeting, one a lovely country teacher and one from Iran originally much to his disgust. My friend drives me mental often but he was still in my mind the whole time so none of these went anywhere.
I have learnt about Indian culture this year with the cooking, a novel titled The Toss of a Lemon, meeting his parents and witnessing his gutless compliance to the opinion of the local Indian mafia not wanting to look too chummy with a gora.
Eagerly anticipating my trip I have organised the important things but will probably be agonising about which clothes to bring, up to the last hour. I have traveled around a lot of Australia and lived in many places having an ex in the army, but I am too paranoid about schedules and keeping track of tickets to call myself a seasoned traveler.
I have tried to learn some hindi phrases. My friend laughed when the first words I remembered where mera dos, makri , kutta and chinti. He said you are saying my friends are spiders dogs and ants. I was concerened when I read on a travel guide I might come across gropy men there and you shouldn't shy away you should hit them and yell and people will come to your aid. He agreed and taught me some cursing in hindi, which we got into the habit of shouting each other for a joke. He said with your height just look down on them and sneer mutha choud!, bahn choud! I made up one based on a girl he knew during the year - suar choud!, I was told that one wasn't a proper saying but would offend the muslims for sure.
Just twelve days till I go now, when I look at my itinerary and my brief stop over in Singapore I get all nervous I think waiting in the International lounge to leave I will be beside myself. This should be the first of many trips I hope. I have always wanted to go to India with all the brilliant colours and handcrafts and I remember the saris we got in Fiji when I was a kid. I want to chew paan, get kissed at the Taj Mahal, buy an indian dress tailor made and a soap carving of an elephant- hopefully ride on an elephant!
Here's hoping it all goes to plan...
